Game Report: Blacksmiths vs the Order - rookie leauge

Hello Guild Ballers!

Here's another report! Commentator style! Imagine the right voices with it and enjoy!

Bill: “Good evening ladies and gentlemen!  Welcome to another guild ball game where our teams try out the new found rookies!  I’m joined here tonight by Phill and we’re hoping for some real excitement, aren’t we Phill?”

Phill: “Yes we are Bill, we are looking forward to some excitment.  Before we start off though, Bill, who do you think will win this game?”

Bill: “Well Phill, I’m no phsycic, but this’ll be a walk in the park for Seasoned Brisket once she gets the ball off the Blacksmiths, don’t you agree?”

Phill: “I don’t know Bill, how many games has Mist tried his same routine over and over without any succes?  You know, the odds are there but he lacks in execution! You can do all the math you want but in the end of the day, it’s still a dice game, Bill!”

Bill: “Sure Phill, but come on!  The Blacksmith coach doesn’t have all the experience that Seasoned Brisket brings!  He even said before the game started he looked into every union player! Union Phill!   The dude doesn’t even realise this is Season 4 and he’s facing the order? Has he been drinking all season?  This coach has never fielded any other captain, even in Season 3, other than Brisket!? If you’re going to do homework, you need to do it right!”

Phill: “Let’s not fight over this Bill, we’re here to commentate on the game, not fight over it before it even begins!  All I’m saying is that I don’t like Mist on this team. Sure he’s got the stats to back his claim, but he hasn’t proven himself to me or the fans, Bill!  At least give me that!”

Bill: “Well Phill, I guess we’ll find out soon enough; Here they come and it looks like the Order won the toss, Mist is dribbling the ball with him quite vividly I must say!”

Phill: “That he is, Bill, but the game hasn’t started yet!”

Bill: “It’s going to Phill, soon enoug!  It’s going to! As can be expected! Mist takes the side with the obstructions, Rookie Fangtooth gives him the space needed and is flanked by Pride.  I’ll wonder what the Lion will do this game too Phill, I’m not that fond of the Lion. What does he do besides just sit there on that piece of Marble in front of the goal?”

Phill: “Nothing much Bill, but still he’s there to prevent the goals when he can!  Looks like Brisket is moving away from that odour her rookie brings and sets herself between the Lion and Harry.”

Bill: “Oh I hope she scores the 2nd goal in turn one Phill!  Or Spigot who’s on the other side next to some fast ground!  Wouldn’t it be wonderfull to have a nice quick football game?”

Phill: “It’s no secret I like the fooballing aspect, Bill, that’s why I love the fish so much.”

Bill: “So the order is a close 2nd?”

Phill: “I wouldn’t go that far Bill…”

Bill: “Here come the Blacksmiths!  All huddled up on the other side of Mist, looks like he’s going to be their target number one!”

Phill: “I don’t get it, why leave room for Spigot and Brisket?”

Bill: “Well they’ll want to have the advantages of cover, Phill, we’ll see if the order can strip the ball of them that easely…  Here goes Mist!”

Bill: “Mist jogs up the field and kicks towards the Blacksmiths!  What’s this?! His left foot is caught in a deep muddy horsetrack; Probably a leftover from a previous game.  He spots the ball going in the wrong direction and tries to correct that with his right foot, pushing the ball to the left, but adjusts the direction too much without slowing the ball down.  It bounces back on the line and thus Blacksmiths get to put it on whoever they want.!

Phill: “I’m not going to say it, Bill…”

Bill: “Yeah yeah, I think it’s too early for the ‘I told you so’ speech Phill, nothing’s happened yet!

Phill: “Again, Mist is not bringing the wonders the church believe he has in him.”

Bill: “Ferrite gets the ball, Phill, they start off with the rookie!  She moves forward and passes the ball towards Farris - only becaurse Bolt is to far away looks like, she was aiming for him first it seems -

Phill: “Look at Mist!  He’s measuring the distance between the horse and the goal and figures he can make it!  Disaster bound to happen I say!

Bill: “So what if Ferrite hits him on the way past her?  Charge that horse to tackle the ball and score! Mist, just do it!”

Phill: “Looks like you’re getting what you want Bill.  Here goes Mist, he’s going straight for Ferrite, swivels around his axis to…  There you go, Mist does it again! Or rather, doesn’t do it again… That’s a rookie for you Bill!”

Bill: “To be honest Phill, I didn’t see that coming either, Ferrite just swooped the legs from under Mist, who recovered and is still standing, sure, but that’s a waste of a player!  The Blacksmiths will run him in the ground now for sure!”

Phill: “You got it Bill! Yet again Mist turns out to be a liability, instead of an asset!  Look at how the order just lets it happen, they move up field to score a goal but they don’t even have the ball!  I’ll take fish any day over this team Bill…”

Bill: “Mist isn’t dead yet.  Knocked down and hurting, but not dead!  And by the looks of things they don’t trust Fangtooth either, see how they keep the ball on their side of the field!  They’re afraid to lose it!”

Phill: “Rightfully so, Bill! If they don’t play their cards right, the order will snatch that ball away before
the smiths even realise it!  Here come the medics! Mist is out beginning of turn 2, who’d have thought?!”

Bill:  “You would’ve, Phill, indeed you said as much…  HOHOHO!!! Bet they didn’t see that coming! Fangtooth didn’t even jog yet, he just jumped 3 times!  Did you see that?!”

Phill: “See it?  I felt the earth underneath me shudder, Bill, no wonder 4 Blacksmiths are on the ground! And didn’t I say they’d lose the ball?! Lukcy for them Fangtooth isn’t the fastest of them all or he’d have scooped up the ball in the same activation!  Well, at least this rookie does what he’s made for!”

Bill: “What are the smiths doing?  Burnish is getting them up? Doesn’t he know he needs to secure the ball?  Brisket it going to steal it away, that fire isn’t going to stop them!”

Phill: “He spotted the problem alright, but his answer isn’t the right one I’m afraid.  Oh what a Brisket move! Route one through the fire for 4”, scooping up the ball, putting the flames out, sprinting away from all that Blacksmith action and passing the ball even further away to Spigot!  She’d go in my fish team if Steamforged would allow it”

Bill: “The grass sure is greener for the order on that side of the pitch, Phill.  And Burnish didn’t really help his teammates now did he? Look at Bolt with all his stamina!?  Can’t even budge with the flames eating away at his pants and the stench of Fangtooth knocking his brains out with foul odor!  They do want to take it out on Fanghtooth now! Shoomerang on his face, some damage is being dealt there! Dirty knives in his thick skin!  Farris is pushing him away! The only one that’s till looking at the game state seems to be their captain, Phill.

Phill: “Yep, Hearth is eyeing the situation! But Harry has spotted that, he just set her on fire!  She wasn’t going to get to Spigot in a million years, but now with her warts on fire she’s not even going to hinder Brisket!  Auch! He even knocked Burnish on his arse!”

Bill: “I’m liking this game already, Phill, remember I told you the order would win?!  Sure they’re behind now with 2 points but… I’m even to late to say it! There goes Spigot and puts that ball in!  2-4 ! Not looking good for the Blacksmiths Phill.”

Phill: “Are you kidding me?  Mist is gone, Blacksmiths have the ball, Fangtooth is out there on his own, already halfway out of the pitch!  That horse is going to put it’s hind legs into that fat chest and he’s going out of here!No way Harry is going to hold his own for long and the rest of the church can’t fight! They can onlhope for the Smiths to screw up somehow! That’s 6-4 right there by the end of the next turn”

Bill: “Don’t get ahead of yourself Phill, you’re not coaching the smiths! And it shows!  Alloy is coming up! He’s going to give the ball away! He’s going to score and give the order the upper hand again!  Mist is coming back! Can he stop Alloy?”

Phill: “Bill! Please! It’s Mist you’re talking about, can he stop anybody?  Haven’t I already proven to you that Mist doesn’t belong!?”

Bill: “I still believe in Mist!  The dice must roll in his favour once!?”

Phill: “What dice?  Give Alloy enough INF and he can just acrobatics out of Mist his engagement, charge the lion for the momentum and score from that!  Only one net hit gives him the momentum! Alloy is no Mist, he’ll pull it off”

Bill: “I don’t think so Phill, look at his coach, he’s not giving out the right instructions, there’s no way Alloy can pull it off with only 3 INF”

Phill: “Bill!?”

Bill: “What?!”

Phill: “Next time you say something like that don’t put your elbow on the speaker button!  You just helped the Blacksmiths, I thought you were rooting for the order?”

Bill: “oh, OH!  I’m sorry! I … I… well, let me join in with the Order fans again through the speakers alright! - Hey Alloy, yo momma!”

Phill: “This is very unprofessional, Bill! I don’t think I can work with you as a co-host anymore in the future…  Look at the poor sod! He just kicked the ball our way! It’s just barely still on the field! A hair further and it would’ve rolled off!’

Bill: “Well fair is fair, I say!”

Phill: “I’m betting your sorry arse gets fired after tonight!”

Bill: “Well, the ball is dead right there… nothing happened, it was an accident, ok?”

Phill: “Yo momma, Bill! Yo momma”

Bill: “What’s that lion doing?”

Phill: “It’s closing in on Alloy”

Bill: “Yeah but why?  Shouldn’t the focus be on Fangtooth, who’s almost off the pitch?”

Phill: “Bill!!  Well at least you didn’t push the speaker button this time, looks like the Blacksmiths don’t realise that just yet...”

Bill: “Oh, here he goes!  And again, good thing the suspension on these commentator seats is A-grade. Looks like the Blacksmiths aren’t that sturdy…”

Phill: “This is getting boring Bill, Burnish just helped them up again.”

Bill: “Oh but the star of the show is moving!  What?! Huh? I blinked and she’s next to spigot, who’s jumping 6” away from Hearth and now she’s charging into Alloy!  He fended off the attack! Lucky for him, if he got knocked down, no saying what Spigot would’ve done to him! You know Phill, for an ex-butcher I feel she doesn’t put out that much hurt…”

Phill: “She’s not about the pain Bill, she left the butchers for a reason, she just didn’t fit in with that rag-tag knife-loving guild, and Spigot will do the work himself, he’s a dual wielding sword and hasn’t forgotten his time with the brewers just yet.”

Bill: “Right you are Phill.  Two little scrums going on here.  Blacksmiths hitting Fangtooth to push him off, smacking Harry around only for the momentum and the Order is giving Alloy some bruises.   They might actually get to score some VP off him.”

Phill: “Your wish seems to be their command.  Oh look Mist just dodged towards the ball, I see another goal coming!!”

Bill: “I can’t believe how smiths are having trouble with Fangtooth! Again he’s jumping into their midst, slowing the lot of them down.  If he isn’t a tar pit that’s keeping a lot of the smiths out of the actual footballing game I don’t know anymore.”

Phill: “I’m ashamed to say it, but I’m enjoying this game and have to admit wishing for a quick game was wrong.”

Bill: “you admit being wrong Phill?”

Phill: “hoho!  There goes Spigot!  He stomps on Alloy, the medics scurry up field but Spigot is already on his next move!  He screams on the top of his lungs, can you make out what he’s saying?”

Bill: “you’re getting old Phill, isn’t it obvious? He’s saying ‘I’m open’ and Mist knows what to do, he passes him the ball! We’re going to win this Phill, 2-6 for the Order!”

Phill: “I am getting old, but nobody wants to hear about me Phill, let’s focus on the game!  Brisket just received the ball and she’s getting out of Ferrite’s range seems like. I’m not giving up on the Blacksmiths yet!  All they need to do is keep the ball away long enough after Brisket scores again and they win it!”

Bill: “You know, I bet Brisket can score from there with the ball!”

Phill: “I know she can! And she will!  She’s no Mist, I said it before and I’ll say it again, I’d want her on my fish team any day!  And I’d also like to see the blacksmiths have a pony on the field, guess that’s not happening either.”

Bill: “Fangtooth just got healed up again by Harry, guess he’s not leaving for the infirmary yet..”

Phill: “Won’t be long now… he’s down to 12 HP”

Bill: “There goes the lass! She shoots!  GOAL!! 2-10 to the Order!”

Phill: “It’s what they’ll do now that matters Bill, we all know that 3rd goal isn’t up for grabs”

Bill: “Don’t look at me!  You just missed out on the best stomping I’ve seen yet!  Fangtooth is face first in the dirt, only 2 HP left on him!  And the ball is on that horse, we know she’s fast enough to make the goal form where she is now!

Phill: “let’s just hope they’re smart enough not to give the order the ball too soon.”

Bill: “You can hope all you want Phill, I’m saying lack of experience is going to be the end of the blacksmiths in this game!”

Phill: “This coach has got it in him to be one of the best Bill, I’m hoping he sees the game like I do now.”

Bill: “Hope all you want, he’s just a kid!  He’ll give the game away, he hasn’t got the patience to grind it out further!  You should already be grateful this game isn’t timed! He’d be down on clock to grind out the game anyway!”

Phill: “ Don’t be like that Bill, this is a friendly game, to help the rookies grow, to show them their place in this game!  And I must say both of them did their share of the work. Ferrite stopped Mist first turn and then helped take out Fangers!  That’s no small feat.”

Bill: “Wait, what? Fangers is off?  I missed it! I missed it Phill!”

Phill: “Yep, Fangtooth is on a stretcher, it’s 4-10 now.  All that’s left is to pick off Harry and looks like Brisket isn’t in a safe place with Hearth on that side.  Tell me, who’s going to steal the ball away from that horse?”

Bill: “Erm, the smiths just gave you that answer themselves Phill…”

Phill: “Guess today isn’t the day…  Farris, what are you doing?! A nice action in itself, don’t get me wrong, sprinting up field through that fire, with quick foot up to get there, unsnapping the ball to get within range of the goal and stay outside of that Lion’s countercharge!  Beautifull! And executed without flaw! 8-10! Only 2 take-outs sooner than they should’ve done it, Bill?”

Bill: “Indeed Phill, indeed.  Bet you he’ll kill the ball next game to claim victory then!  Now he’s just figuring out how to keep Brisket from scoring with Alloy returning from the field.  Alloy and Hearth being the only two models that can reach her. I’ll tell you right now it can’t be done!”

Phill: “Lay it out there for me and the listeners Bill, what’s the game plan here for the order.”

Bill: “Look, As soon as Hearth activates, Brisket is safe, since she can unpredictable move out of Alloy, even if he acrobatics in there again, she doesn’t need the ball till she can score.  Here’s what’s going to happen. The order is going to stall, Spigot is going to pick up the ball after the goal kick and sit out of range from Hearth AND Alloy but within range of ‘I’m open’.

Phill: “uhu, I follow.”

Bill: “From there on it’s just up to Brisket to see if she has enough momentum to clear conditions on herself, maybe another to dodge out of engagement with whoever is hindering her when she uses I’m open. And then one more to score.  Don’t forget she has enough INF she can hit Alloy once or twice if needed. She is within jogging distance to score!”

Phill: “Well Bill, I just had to check if you didn’t hit that speaker button again, you must be in sinc with the Order’s coach.  That’s exactly what happened! Hearth went in on Brisket and knocked her down, Harry stood her up with ‘keep your chin up’ and kicked wildly around himself to gain momentum. After that Spigot ran up towards his captain, at that point Alloy had to do something and decided to go all in on Brisket - she did unpredictable out of melee from Hearth, Alloy dodged back in and hit her -  dodging out at end of activation towards Spigot placing himself in the ballpath. If it were up to me I would’ve kept Brisket engaged to up the TN to 5 for Spigot AND be in the ballpath. But it wouldn’t have helped much. The order rolled 2 5’s on the pass, Brisket walked up to the goal and scored using momentum for bonus time and rolled a 3-4-5-6. Pick your die for the winning number on the goal, either one hits it!   Guess we’ll wrap it up here then folks! 8-14 to the order!”

Bill: “It was a nice game Phill, it didn’t have to end this way, but it did!”

Phill: “indeed it did Bill, indeed it did.”

OX: “That Brisket is one lucky lass, Loyal above all.  I’m going to repay my debt to her soon enough!”

That's all folks!

Bob Out